by Jay Carter
A psychopathic ex threatens to cause a single mom to lose her job.
Everyone who speaks out about their experiences with psycho/sociopaths or spreads factual information about the “cluster B” personality disorders is helping others to see themselves, their relationships, their whole lives more realistically. A realistic perspective empowers us to make the best decisions for ourselves, and also, we feel stronger when we recognize that we are not alone, that what we are going through, or have survived, is not so unusual and extreme that no one will believe us if we told them about it. It helps to learn that the abuse and the dirty tricks we have been subjected to actually are standard psychopathic behaviors. It allows us to shed any guilt we may have from being mistreated or doubts about our own sanity. It gives us the confidence to redefine and set limits on unacceptable behavior. When we recognize the patterns, we also know better what to expect so that we may prepare accordingly. We can direct our energy to where it is effective instead of wasting it on an unrealistic notion; something that will never happen, no matter how hard we try.
And then there’s the bigger picture. Just think; if everyone had awareness and understanding of psychopathy, you wouldn’t have to worry about your ex causing you to lose your job. All psychopaths lie. All psychopaths do hurtful, harmful things “without any reason.” It doesn’t always “take two to tango.” The world needs to know these things. We need to tell our stories, expose the evil-doers, and gain some clout and credibility. The time and opportunity is now with the Internet as a vehicle for all who have suffered. We can make a difference—we already have. Anyone can start a blog or post comments on websites. Let’s keep the ball rolling so the next generation, at least, has the heads-up we had to survive without.
If your ex follows through with his threat, show this discussion thread to your employer! What do you think would happen?
- identifying psychopaths (thejohnsmithblog.wordpress.com)
- Jobs Most Likely To Have Psychopaths (kvil.cbslocal.com)
- Inside the Psyche of the 1% – Many Actually Believe Their Ideology of Greed Makes for a Better World (rinf.com)
- 7 Signs You’re Working With A Psychopath (businessinsider.com)
- Which Careers Draw The Most Psychopaths? (kearth101.cbslocal.com)
- Does Your Job Attract Pyschopaths? (philadelphia.cbslocal.com)
- Which professions have the most psychopaths? (theweek.com)
- Sociopath/psychopath Dichotomy (thoughtuncommon.wordpress.com)
Covert narcissists are skilled at appearing “normal”. They choose a victim they feel they can dominate or manipulate, and they choose opportunities to abuse their victim when there are no witnesses or in a passive-aggressive, underhanded manner so that their secret mean streak isn’t exposed to others. Motivated by self-preservation and self gain, they lack fail-safes, such as empathy or a moral conscience, against selfish behavior that is harmful to others. Denial is a characteristic of the disorder. They can be highly critical of other people’s behavior, but they always feel righteous about their own.
- Empathy and the Lack of It (robertlindsay.wordpress.com)
- Sociopath V.S Narcissist. (freefromhim.wordpress.com)
- The Narcissistic Mother (psychologytoday.com)
- Narcissistic Personalities (angelspiritfree.wordpress.com)
- 6 Signs of Narcissism You May Not Know About (psychologytoday.com)
- Did you have a narcissistic mother? Test (lunaticoutpost.com)
- The Relationship between Narcissism and Bipolar Disorder (psychologytoday.com)
- The Age of Narcissism (jessescrossroadscafe.blogspot.com)
- Conversational Narcissism (operaprince2013.wordpress.com)
He was just found guilty in a Utah court of murdering his wife. Evidence suggests that he also killed his brother when he was a boy and attempted murder on his mother. Mormon doctor Martin MacNeill is facing prison for life. So, why the proud look, the triumphant grin?
Because he got away with so much for so long.
Michele MacNeill was found unconscious in a bathtub in 2007. Prosecutors claim that her husband left her there to die after giving her a lethal cocktail of prescription drugs.
Red flags suggesting psychopathy can be found in Martin MacNeill’s medical career. He was fired from his job at Bringham Young University in 1999 for undisclosed reasons. Apparently, there had been accusations of rape and multiple complaints about misdiagnosis and unprofessional misconduct.
MacNeill is now awaiting sentencing after being found guilty of both first degree murder and obstruction of justice.
‘I think my dad really got off on seeing what he could get away with,’ daughter Alexis said.
- Jury: Martin MacNeill’s ‘heartless’ nature (thetrialdivas.com)
- Utah doctor’s conviction follows family’s pursuit (sfgate.com)
- 5 Things to Know about Utah doctor murder trial (azstarnet.com)
- Utah doctor convicted in wife’s “almost perfect murder” (cbsnews.com)
See also Psychopaths Rule!
In our understanding of the world around us, we are restricted by the framework of our knowledge and beliefs. When we try to make sense of other people’s behavior, our minds rationalize to avoid cognitive dissonance, or contradicting beliefs, sometimes resulting in unrealistic perceptions. The decisions we base on those perceptions will be ineffective or inappropriate at best, while in a worst case scenario; lead to a lifetime of misery or death.
- See no Evil: Why is there so little Psychopathy Awareness? (psychopathyawareness.wordpress.com)
- 12 cognitive biases that prevent you from being rational (reasonandlogic.wordpress.com)
- Cognitive Dissonance Theory (eam006.wordpress.com)
- 14 Psychopathic Tactics (psychopathresistance.wordpress.com)
Learn to identify their tactics
Dr. George Simon, author of In Sheep’s Clothing—Understanding and Dealing with Manipulative People, presents this list of 14 tactics that manipulators use to get you to do what they want. He points out the importance of recognizing that these tactics are offensive moves employed by the covert-aggressive to either maintain a position of power, gain power, or remove an obstacle from getting what he wants. You’ll be better equipped to deal with manipulators if you are familiar with this list of tactics, and can identify them when you encounter them:
- Denial – playing innocent, refusing to admit they have done something harmful.
- Selective inattention – playing dumb, or acting oblivious; refusing to pay attention to anything that might divert them from achieving their goal.
- Rationalization– making excuses or justifying their behavior, often in very convincing ways.
- Diversion – changing the subject, dodging the issue, distracting us from the real problem.
- Lying – deliberately telling untruths, concealing the truth, lying by omission.
- Covert Intimidation – intimidation through veiled threats; hints that “it’s a tough job market out there.”
- Guilt-tripping – using the conscientiousness of their victim against them to keep them self-doubting and anxious.
- Shaming – using subtle sarcasm and put-downs to make the victim feel inadequate, unworthy, and anxious.
- Playing the Victim role – playing the innocent victim to elicit compassion; convincing the victim that he/she is hurting in some way so that the victim will try to relieve their distress.
- Vilifying the Victim – making the victim the “bad guy”; pretending he’s only defending himself.
- Playing the servant role – disguising their personal agendas as service to a nobler cause.
- Seduction – flattering and overtly supporting others to get them to lower their defenses and be trusting.
- Projecting the blame (blaming others) – shifting the blame, scapegoating.
- Minimization – a combination of denial and rationalization, “making a molehill out of a mountain”.
- Video interviews with Dr George Simon
- 7 Social Hacks For Manipulating People—PsychTronics (250ideationstation.wordpress.com)
- George Simon—workshops on manipulators and character disorders (cryingoutforjustice.wordpress.com)
Dr. George Simon, author of In Sheep’s Clothing—Understanding and Dealing with Manipulative People (See book cover in the sidebar!)
“A manipulative person … is a covertly aggressive personality.”
“You ask a manipulator a direct question, you rarely get a direct answer.”
12-year-old Rebecca was terrorized by as many as 15 girls who ganged up on her and picked on her for months. The torment became overbearing, and seeing no other way out, she ended her own life. Two girls, the major culprits, have been arrested. One of them went to the same school as the victim and had been dating her former boyfriend. The 14-year-old bully went around to friends at school and tried to turn them against Rebecca. The girl’s Facebook comments were callous and hateful, expressing desire for the death of young Rebecca. The second girl arrested was a former best friend of the victim who was influenced by the other girl to turn on her.
Sociopaths come in many guises; they bring suffering and destruction upon us in all its possible shapes and sizes, many times multiplying the damage by influencing others to join their evil missions.
- Felony charges for girl accused of bullying 12-year-old to suicide (kdvr.com)
- Don’t Be A Minion (dontbeaminion.com)
- Bystanders and Bullying (PsychopathResistance)
- A Game of Destroying People (PsychopathResistance)
- The Psychopathic Duo (PsychopathResistance)
The Disconnection of Psychopaths
- Psychopathic traits in teenagers not cast in stone (sciencedaily.com)
- White Matter Deficits in Psychopathic Offenders and Correlation with Factor Structure (plosone.org)
- Can Genetics Predict Psychopathy? (drvitelli.typepad.com)
- A neurological basis for the lack of empathy in psychopaths (esciencenews.com)
Psychopaths and sociopaths are likely to appear friendly and generous. They are masters of deception, adept at faking emotions they don’t actually have—compassion, remorse, or humility—to win trust or gain power over others. Behind a convincing facade of respectability, intelligence, and high moral standards, they operate outside of standard ethical boundaries; recruiting lower-level psychopaths to do their bidding and manipulating normal, “good” people into accepting or supporting their shady agendas.
- The Making of a Minion (dontbeaminion.com)
- Dangerous Mind Games: How Psychopaths Manipulate and Deceive (http://psychopathyawareness.wordpress.com)
Christopher Lane, a 22-year old Australian student visiting his girlfriend in Oklahoma, was shot and killed by teenagers—because they were bored.
Two childhood best friends killed teenager Katelyn Wolfe for a thrill and then bound her body, attached it to a weight and threw it into a lake.
5 steps to change the world
1 Acknowledge that sociopaths exist. This is more radical than it may sound. For many of us, it means abandoning a belief we have held a lifetime; that “there’s good in everyone.” While that is true in most cases, it is critical to understand that there are exceptions and that they are not easily recognized.
- Aussie baseball player killed by “bored” Okla. teens, police say – CBS News (cbsnews.com)
- Australian student Christopher Lane laid to rest after U.S. shooting (cnn.com)
- Katelyn Wolfe murder 6/6/2013 Bloomfield, IN *Jordan Buskirk and Randal Crosley charged with her murder* (mylifeofcrime.wordpress.com)
- Murder suspects hijack victim’s Facebook page to throw off police (dailydot.com)
- Trial dates set for Buskirk and Crosley (wthitv.com)
Lovefraud’s mission is to educate the public about sociopaths, and one way to do that is by working with the media. We hope to interest the media in producing stories about disordered personalities, the damage they cause, and how to spot dangerous people before becoming involved.
From an article by Rob at Angiemedia:
Sociopaths In Our Midst Hate the Truth and Its Advocates
| “Twisting of meanings is a clue to psychopathy. They’re masters of “doublespeak”, creating verbal traps and impossible situations that leave non-psychopaths bewildered.”
Harrison Koehli Red Pill Press,
Publisher of Political Ponerology
- Guard Yourself Against Verbal Violence in Nursing (inanurseblog.wordpress.com)
- Sebastian Kügler: Standing up against verbal abuse (vizZzion.org)
- Stop it, You’re Hurting Me (h8my20s.wordpress.com)
(Warning: This post may cause gas.)
Don't misinterpret the sociopath's ability to manipulate and demean you as a skill.
A skill is something we're taught and we learn. The sociopath was born with this ability.
Harming and hurting individuals is his nature, and he does it with the same ease he pisses and shits. And like a bowel movement, there is no need for him to tap into empathy, remorse or his phantom conscience:
Do people who say that believe there are no real victims? Or that there are victims but that they should be silent about their experiences? Maybe they believe that victimization is a ‘choice’ or that the victim must be partially responsible for the abuse—or even deserve it. Maybe they think that when people talk about their suffering or the mistreatment they have endured, they do it only to gain an advantage, such as attention or sympathy.
The pain and damage sociopaths cause, without remorse, needs to be taken seriously. Covert or emotional abuse is known to cause PTSD, wreck lives, and lead to fatalities. Laura19 writes on Lovefraud.com: “Excruciating emotional pain. Numbness. Loss of appetite. Sleepless nights. Obsessive thoughts. Inability to concentrate. Loss of pleasure in cherished activities. Lack of energy. Anxiety and panic attacks. All of the above will probably sound familiar to those of us who have been devalued and discarded…” Read about her remarkable path to recovery after surviving a relationship with a personality disordered person at lovefraud.com.
- Emotional Abuse Is a Silent Killer (kellythompsonlive.com)
- Emotional abuse: How to recognize the signs (pinkandblack-magazine.com)
- To All Victims of Abuse… (secretangelps911.wordpress.com)
- Emotional Abuse and the Law (childhoodtraumarecovery.com)
- Emotional Abuse is more than just yelling (krishannah.wordpress.com)
- Verbal and Emotional Abuse – Dragging it into the light. (gaiamojo.wordpress.com)
- The dripping tap of emotional abuse in the Sociopath and Narcissist relationship (paularenee.wordpress.com)
- INDIRECT Abusers (sbstardust3.wordpress.com)
“He who passively accepts evil is as much involved in it as he who helps to perpetrate it.”
Martin Luther King Jr
In most bullying situations, the target finds himself isolated and alone. Work colleagues, who may have been friendly and supportive previously, melt away. The people he thought were “friends” turn out to be mere fair-weather friends and he is left feeling like a pariah and an outcast.
There are many reasons why people fail to come to the aid of someone who is being bullied. These include: Read more…
Someone who is being subject to narcissistic abuse may rarely leave the house, never go out with friends, or speak to strangers because he doesn’t know who’s been turned against him; he doesn’t know who he can trust. The experience is painful and can lead to mental and physical problems, including depression and anxiety. In some cases, feelings of despair lead to suicide.
I was happy to land my second review paper in the journal Aggression and Violent Behavior. Quibbling over terminology is not uncommon in any field, but I make the case that these two terms have to be treated separately. Robert Hare, the designer of the the Psychopathy Checklist (PCL), and Paul Babiak, state in their book Snakes in Suits…
“Psychopaths blame their victims for what happened
and consider the victims’ fate irrelevant.”
The mocking and controlling behavior of the psychopathic mind is motivated by a sense of entitlement and a claim for submission. The submission brings them feelings of excitement and superiority. They enjoy what they consider to be a game of destroying people. It’s amusing to them.
Posted Apr 4, 2013
By Martha Neil
An Illinois family law attorney was sentenced to life in prison in the murders of his former client, Nova Henry, and her 10-month-old daughter.
The government said Fredrick Goings, who had represented Henry in a child-support case against a professional basketball player, shot her in January 2009 at her condominium in Chicago’s South Loop as she ran from the lawyer, holding her daughter, the Chicago Sun-Times reports.
Goings may have been angry about an unpaid $24,000 legal bill that she and her new attorney were then contesting, prosecutors said. Goings and Henry also reportedly had an on-again, off-again romantic relationship.
Cook County Judge Maura Slattery Boyle called Goings, who maintains his innocence and contends there was a rush to judgment, a “fraud” and a predator. “You are a facade as a lawyer and a human being,” she told him.
The murder case was high-profile because Henry is a former girlfriend of Eddy Curry, once a member of the Chicago Bulls. He also played for the Miami Heat and the New York Knicks.
Although Henry’s daughter with Curry was killed along with her mother, their 3-year-old son, who was also present at the scene of the slayings, was not physically injured.
The Associated Press also has a story.