Isn’t it amazing how sociopaths can run around smearing people, telling insidious lies with impunity….THEN……when WE try to warn others (with the TRUTH) about possible danger of the socio, it’s “Kill the Messenger” time….and we are the “Messenger”.
What’s up with that?
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What you are describing is the standard abuser protocol called DARVO, an acronym for Deny, Attack, Reverse roles of Victim and Offender.
Your question and your righteous outrage are about psycho/sociopaths’ ability to harm others easily and repeatedly—with impunity—sometimes with devastating consequences for their victim. As if that wasn’t bad enough, the victim’s friends and family may withhold support or reject him/her at the worst of times because the abuser had the evil foresight to secure their sympathy and support, and at the same time, destroy the victim’s reputation and credibility.
The reason why pathological aggressors are so successful with this cunning scheme is quite simple: they are exceptionally skilled actors with a lifetime of practice in lying, manipulating, persuading, and deceiving. The psycho/sociopath will callously aim to crush his victim, unperturbed by ethical concerns. The victim’s options will be limited by his moral standards, and without the persuasive power of a psychopath, he may be unable to convince others of the truth of the matter.
Another reason why many of us are conned again and again is because we cannot fathom that an outwardly nice, intelligent, respectable person whom we may have expended exceptional kindness, trust, and generosity; would be capable of acting so atrociously. We find it hard to believe that there really are human beings who don’t have a conscience and we fail to see the patterns in our experiences that verify any ‘unpleasant’ facts that contradict or challenge our long held beliefs and attitudes.