Recognizing Toxic People

Aside

The Toxic Personality


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A Fox in the Henhouse

fox-guarding-the-hen-house

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psychopath Individuals with psychopathic traits are often attracted to affinity groups—religious, atheist, political, or social groups of people who share common values, beliefs, or interests. The collective trust that members of these groups have in one another and their common belief system provides a perfect cover for the psychopathic person. A psychopathic individual can be highly skilled at accurately mimicking the group’s beliefs or values while in the presence of its members. As a result, trust is easily gained and his or her true motives or covert activities are less likely to be discovered or recognized as malicious.

An affinity group that has been victimized may have members who are unable to face the truth about a covert bully. Often, they will rationalize his or her behaviors and continue to believe that the person is basically good at heart.

Unfortunately, it is common for the group to side with the psychopathic person if he or she has targeted an individual member to exploit, abuse, or ostracize. With a well established virtuous public persona and respect from the group, skillful manipulation and deceit, and a careful choice of target, the aggressor will turn the tables and have others believe the victim is the guilty party.

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A NON-PROFIT ORGANIZATION PROVIDING INFORMATION
AND SUPPORT FOR VICTIMS OF PSYCHOPATHY


Almost a Psychopath

Do I (or Does Someone I Know) Have a Problem with Manipulation and Lack of Empathy?

AlmostaPsychopath

Do you know someone who is manipulative and full of himself? Does someone you know charm the masses yet lack the ability to deeply connect with anyone?

Grandiosity and exaggerated self-worth. Pathological lying. Manipulation. Lack of remorse. Shallowness. Exploitation. These are the qualities of Almost Psychopaths. They are not the deranged criminals or serial killers that might be coined “psychopaths” in the movies or on TV. They are spouses, coworkers, bosses, neighbors, and people in the news who exhibit many of the same behaviors as a full-blown psychopath, but with less intensity and consistency.

In Almost a Psychopath, Ronald Schouten, MD, JD, and James Silver, JD, draw on scientific research and their own experiences to help you identify if you are an Almost Psychopath and, if so, guide you to interventions and resources to change your behavior.

If you think you have encountered an Almost Psychopath, they offer practical tools to help you: recognize the behavior, attitudes, and characteristics of the Almost Psychopath; make sense of interactions you’ve had with Almost Psychopaths; devise strategies for dealing with them in the present; make informed decisions about your next steps; and learn ways to help an Almost Psychopath get better control of their behavior.

Click the book cover to read more.


Covert Narcissism

Covert narcissists are skilled at appearing “normal”. They choose a victim they feel they can dominate or manipulate, and they choose opportunities to abuse their victim when there are no witnesses or in a passive-aggressive, underhanded manner so that their secret mean streak isn’t exposed to others. Motivated by self-preservation and self gain, they lack fail-safes, such as empathy or a moral conscience, against selfish behavior that is harmful to others. Denial is a characteristic of the disorder. They can be highly critical of other people’s behavior, but they always feel righteous about their own.spotanarc

Ted Bundy: a really nice guy…

tinydotscopper

Ted Bundy in custody, Florida, 1978 or 1979

“Nice and friendly.”

That is the persona of many con artists, abusers, paedophiles, and killers. Ted Bundy was handsome and educated. The number of young women he raped and killed has not been determined, but it may have been more than 200.

Ted Bundy was intelligent and charming.

tinydotscopper

Ted Bundy

Missing 8-Year-Old Was Bundy’s First Victim? (prweb.com)
Imagining Ted Bundy (psychologytoday.com)
The Ted Bundy Stats on Facebook – Unbelievable! (bonjupatten.com)

10-tinydotscopper

Ted Bundy's 1968 VW Beetle.

Ted Bundy’s 1968 VW Beetle. This was the car he used for most of his murders. Now on display at the National Museum of Crime & Punishment in Washington, DC (Photo credit: Wikipedia)


Grandiosity

superiority complex

 

People affected with narcissism or psychopathy have a false belief in their own superiority and a sense of entitlement. An arrogant manner can be an indication of these tendencies.


Nice and friendly?

Bernie Madoff

Bernie Madoff was trusted and well liked. He ripped off whoever he could, even his old friends.

Since, in the majority of cases, people who indulge in abuse are selective about whom they abuse, other people are typically surprised—or in disbelief—when hearing that someone is experiencing on-going and periodic abuse from someone they know and have always seen as nice and friendly. “Nice and friendly” is the persona of many conmen, abusers, and killers. Although many folks really are as nice and friendly as they seem, some most definitly are not. Like Ted Bundy.

English: Ted Bundy in custody, Florida, 1978 o...

Ted Bundy in custody, Florida, 1978 or 1979.

Psychopathic Dominance

Aside

psychopath If most members of a group are honest and intelligent, then evil people will be identified and excluded. When most members have psychopathic traits, the honest and intelligent people are identified and excluded! In a psychopath-controlled environment, it’s the honest people who seem defective and deviant.
psychopaths


Criticizing a narcissist


“Narcissists mainly want to punish or defeat someone who has threatened their highly favorable views of themselves.”

“People who are preoccupied with validating a grandiose
self-image apparently find criticism highly upsetting
and lash out against the source of it.”

Beware of…

When people say that i’m not the best.

Psychopaths’ lack of empathy and guilt
allows them to lie with impunity; they do
not see the value of telling the truth 
unless it will help get them what they want.