Sociopaths twist words, manipulate, and deflect…

…and they’re good at it.


Originally posted on Dating a Sociopath:

The sociopath uses a number of tools to manipulate.

The sociopath uses a number of tools to manipulate.

If you spend enough time around the sociopath, his Mr Nice, Mr Helpful, and Mr Wonderful personas wear off. Once he has his slippers firmly under your table, hand in the fridge, and the warm half of your bed, a totally different character begins to appear. To cope with this, you need mental agility, for the sociopath is the master game player. And what he intends to do is play a game with your life. You will be left feeling absolutely confused.

Deflection3What is deflection? Deflection takes focus away from the accusation. To use an example, if you had concerns that your partner was cheating, perhaps you have evidence that he is having an affair? You confront your partner, holding the evidence, and you are fairly sure that you now have him cornered… Or so you think!

Evidence, means little…

Read original 850 more words:

Sociopaths twist words, manipulate, and deflect.

twisting your words

BraikerRelated articles on Psychopath Resistance:


Common Types of Manipulation

Dr George Simon [blog], author of several best-selling books on psychopathy, has given descriptive labels to three manipulative tactics that all victims of narcissistic/psychopathic abuse are sure to recognize. The terminology offered by Dr Simon makes it easier to make sense of behaviors that otherwise may seem confusing or even cause self-doubt, and to discuss them. When you see manipulative behavior, it will probably reflect one or more of these tactics.

Manipulation

See more blog posts relating to Dr. George Simon:


Retaliation

Retaliation2

When deprived of narcissistic supply, narcissists experience symptoms similar to the withdrawal symptoms of a drug addict; becoming delusional, agitated, helpless, and emotionally unhinged. They disintegrate and crumble, and may even experience a psychotic episode. They engage in “magical thinking;” believing that they are omniscient, omnipotent, and that they cannot fail. This makes them fearless and relentless in their pursuit of revenge.


See also:
Vindictiveness
Narcissistic Supply (Wikipedia))
Narcissistic Supply (The Narcissistic Life)
Narcissistic Supply (Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers)
Narcissists, Narcissistic Supply and Sources of Supply (Sam Vaknin)


A Typical Smear Tactic

LindaMartinez

blameSee also:
The Smear Campaign—Trademark of the Sociopath
Sociopaths always attack the messenger
Smear Campaign Tactics
Slander Tactics

tinydotsgold

Dr. George Simon explains how manipulation tactics work.

Notice that Dr. Simon has given descriptive names to common types of manipulation: offensive power tactics, responsibility avoidance behaviors, and tactics of impression management.


Common Types of Manipulation


Baiting & Bashing


Toxic people regularly engage in this extraordinarily vile behavior. They get away with it because they are deviously skilled at misleading others and obscuring what is actually going on. Watch out for staging and framing—or B&B!

Baiting&Bashing

See also: Denial and DARVO (Deny, Attack, Reverse Victim/Offender)

 


 

From Lovefraud.com


Psychopathic RecordsPsychopathic ex threatens a single mom to lose her job.

Human replies:
November 16, 2013

Everyone who speaks out about their experiences with psycho/sociopaths or spreads factual information about the “cluster B” personality disorders is helping others to see themselves, their relationships, their whole lives more realistically. A realistic perspective empowers us to make the best decisions for ourselves, and also, we feel stronger when we recognize that we are not alone, that what we are going through, or have survived, is not so unusual and extreme that no one will believe us if we told them about it. It helps to learn that the abuse and the dirty tricks we have been subjected to actually are standard psychopathic behaviors. It allows us to shed any guilt we may have from being mistreated or doubts about our own sanity. It gives us the confidence to redefine and set limits on unacceptable behavior. When we recognize the patterns, we also know better what to expect so that we may prepare accordingly. We can direct our energy to where it is effective instead of wasting it on an unrealistic notion; something that will never happen, no matter how hard we try.

JackassAnd then there’s the bigger picture. Just think; if everyone had a basic understanding of psychopathy, you wouldn’t have to worry about your ex causing you to lose your job. All psychopaths lie. All psychopaths do hurtful, harmful things “without any reason.” It doesn’t always “take two to tango.” The world needs to know these things. We need to tell our stories, expose the evil-doers, and gain some clout and credibility. The time and opportunity is now with the Internet as a vehicle for all who have suffered. We can make a difference—we already have. Anyone can start a blog or post comments on websites. Let’s keep the ball rolling so the next generation, at least, has the heads-up we had to survive without.

If your ex follows through with his threat, show this discussion thread to your employer! What do you think would happen?


14 Psychopathic Tactics

 

Learn to identify their tactics!

wolf_in_sheep_clothing_1_-400x253 In Sheep’s Clothing

Dr. George Simon, author of In Sheep’s Clothing—Understanding and Dealing with Manipulative People, presents this list of 14 tactics that manipulators use to get you to do what they want. He points out the importance of recognizing that these tactics are offensive moves employed by the covert-aggressive to either maintain a position of power, gain power, or remove an obstacle from getting what he wants. You’ll be better equipped to deal with manipulators if you are familiar with this list of tactics and able to identify them when you encounter them:

    1. Denial – playing innocent, refusing to admit they have done something harmful.
    2. Selective inattention – playing dumb, or acting oblivious; refusing to pay attention to anything that might divert them from achieving their goal.
    3. Rationalization – making excuses or justifying their behavior, often in very convincing ways.
    4. Diversion – changing the subject, dodging the issue, distracting us from the real problem.
    5. Lying – deliberately telling untruths, concealing the truth, lying by omission.
    6. Covert Intimidation – intimidation through veiled threats.
    7. Guilt-tripping – using the conscientiousness of their victim against them to keep them self-doubting and anxious.
    8. Shaming – using subtle sarcasm and put-downs to make the victim feel inadequate, unworthy, and anxious.
    9. Playing the Victim role – playing the innocent victim to elicit compassion.
    10. Vilifying the Victim – making the victim the “bad guy”; pretending he’s only defending himself.
    11. Playing the servant role – disguising their personal agendas as service to a nobler cause.
    12. Seduction – flattering and overtly supporting others to get them to lower their defenses and be trusting.
    13. Projecting the blame (blaming others) – shifting the blame, scapegoating.
    14. Minimization – a combination of denial and rationalization, “making a molehill out of a mountain”.

Playing the Victim (film)

Playing the Victim

squiggle3k


Why is it so hard to hold psychopathic abusers accountable?


 

Without Conscience

Because they play dirty. They don’t follow any rules of civil interaction. Lacking a conscience, they have no moral constraints on their behavior, and when confronted, they simply deny their evil deeds. They couldn’t care less about civility, decency, morality, or honor as long as their actions pay out and their unethical behavior is kept under the public radar. They are free to lie, con, deceive, manipulate, intimidate, incriminate, or use any other trick in the book.

chesskingWe may not recognize the disingenuous conniving techniques they use to control and manipulate. An experienced abuser is extraordinarily devious and almost impossible to pin down. Primed with denial strategies, he’s always ahead of the game.

Psychopaths use numerous deception tactics to create and maintain a respectable, virtuous, likable—maybe even admirable—public persona that deceives the best of us. They take advantage of our tendency to not recognize evidence that contradicts our beliefs, such as dishonesty and other lowly character traits in an individual who has ‘won’ our trust, respect, and appreciation. The persona provides a cover for devious schemes, exploitation, and abuse. 

A psychopathic individual may believe that all of us play the same game—only he is smarter and superior while most other people are weak and inferior pushovers. Until understanding of psychopathy becomes widespread public knowledge, the predator’s hunting grounds will remain saturated with easy prey.

 Persona: the aspect of someone’s character that is presented to or perceived by others.

MessyRule3

Related articles

13 Rules for dealing with a psycho/sociopath

By Dr. Martha Stout

The Sociopath Next Door

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Accept that some people have no conscience; that there are evil people in this world who do not act out of concern or love for another.
Listen to your instincts — labels (professional roles) do not make a good person. Look carefully at someone who “carries” a professional label, judging whether that individual’s behavior fits what is expected of that professional role.
Practice the rule of threes — One lie or broken promise may be a misunderstanding, two lies may involve a serious mistake, three lies — the individual is not trustworthy. Stay away from that individual.
Question authority.
Suspect flattery — when someone flatters you excessively, telling you how much they appreciate you or like it when you visit or how much they enjoy your conversations.
Redefine your concept of respect — respect must be earned. Don’t automatically give respect to an individual because of her professional role or her relationship to you.
Refuse to join the game — do not try to outsmart the sociopath. Do not reduce yourself to his level.
Once you identify a sociopath, avoid him, refuse any kind of interaction. It is the only way to protect yourself.
Question your tendency to pity too easily. Anyone who actively campaigns for your pity or consistently hurts others is likely a sociopath. Pity should be reserved for those who truly deserve it. Make sure the individual who seeks your help really needs it.
10 Do not try to redeem the unredeemable. If you are dealing with someone without a conscience, you cannot change them, no matter how educated or loving you are. Sociopaths have no reason to change; they like who they are.
11 Never agree to help a sociopath conceal her true character. You don’t owe the sociopath anything. Don’t believe that you are like her, no matter what she says. You are nothing like her.
12 Defend your psyche. Humanity is not a failure. Being kind and loving and caring is the best way to live. It is the way most people live their lives.
13 Living well is the best revenge.

The Sociopath Next DoorRelated articles